Let us be careful not to underestimate the power of love’s kindness - it is a superpower. 1 John 4:7-13; Psalm 103; 1Corinthians 13:1-4; Romans 2:1-4. Let’s first look at God’s love.
1 John 4:7-13. God is love (agape) and He loves (agapao)
God expresses His love by His patience and kindness. Why? Because, first it is who and what He is, and so it is what He does. And second, He knows who and what we are and what we need. Therefore, God, who is love, loves as love loves: Love is patient, love is kind.
Psalm 103
1Corinthians 13:1-4
Romans 2:1-4
t https://biblehub.com/psalms/103-10.htm
Ezra 9:13 After all that has come upon us because of our evil deeds and our great guilt (though You, our God, have punished us less than our iniquities deserve and have given us such a remnant as this)
Lamentations 3:22 Because of the loving devotion of the LORD we are not consumed, for His mercies never fail.
Am I patient? Am I kind? How does my presence affect the environment I enter?
Psalm 130:3 If you, LORD, kept a record of sins, Lord, who could stand?
Nehemiah 9:30-31,33 30For many years you were patient with them. By your Spirit you warned them through your prophets. Yet they paid no attention, so you gave them into the hands of the neighboring peoples. 31But in your great mercy you did not put an end to them or abandon them, for you are a gracious and merciful God… 33In all that has happened to us, you have remained righteous; you have acted faithfully, while we acted wickedly.
Being gentle and tender, being patient, biting my tongue, not just to stop myself from saying something I shouldn’t, or the way that I shouldn’t. But, to slow down and be deliberate in my response, considerate of the one in front of me.
That I might be of good service, useful to this person, in this moment, because I have been patient and made myself useful by being attentive to the directing hand of God - by not going my way, but sought His way.
Just let us see how God is love, and I love is kind, and hope that this patient.
Then there is the implicit command given to us in 1Cor 13 - as we have been commanded to love, as we have been loved, weirdo told what love is, having a defined for us, as demonstrated by God, and imitated by us
We love because God loves us first - 1John 4 - Love IS patient - it shows restraint. Love IS kind - it is tenderhearted - gentle and useful.
How do we exercise this aspect of love? While abiding in Christ, we indulge, not our flesh and its way, but God’s Spirit and His way - bearing the fruit of the Spirit:
Love IS patient - able to accept or tolerate delays, problems, or suffering without becoming annoyed or anxious - it is slow to anger
It, I, suffer long, I am forbearing, persevering
Love, therefore, IS long-tempered - refusing to retaliate with anger (because of human reasoning - as opposed to God’s will (Romans 12:3))
James 1:20 “...slow to anger because man’s anger does NOT produce the righteousness, the righteous life, that God desires and approves - the good things God wants to be done.” as we see “God is slow to anger
Slow: taking time to deliberate, to be deliberate; unhurried; taking consideration
Therefore, it extends, it stretches out, a long way (turning the other cheek; walking two miles, when forced to walk one; forgiving 70 times 7 times; doing unto others what one wants to be done to them, and how; it waits long for the “son” to repent and return )
…and expresses anger as the Lord directs - meaning one must be attentive to God, and quick to listen
James 1:19 - which does not necessarily mean to, listen quickly, but in fact to be PATIENT and remain until God’s righteousness AND the fruits of the Spirit have time to work past our condition and into our minds to still and stay our hearts (this is the exercise of self-control (2Pee 1:5) - also a fruit of the Spirit - Gal 5:22)
So… it is to delay, long - one’s own passionate or enflamed reaction, to make room for God’s directed proper response
In so doing, by delaying long our reaction, taking time to listen to the Spirit’s prompting and directing, His reminder of God’s way of loving (us), we are able to be "to be patient in bearing the offenses and injuries of others; to be mild and slow in avenging; to be long-suffering, slow to anger, slow to punish" (and how do we tend to punish??) and able to do what is really needed - not what we thought or felt was needed - according to the need of the beloved (not my need to…)
And love IS kind… gentle and full of service to others - that means keeping them AND their real needs at the forefront of one’s good intentions for them - and meeting them God’s way, useful to them; is the Spirit-produced goodness which meets the need and avoids human harshness (cruelty).
Loving kindness does all of this with a tender, gentle spirit, or heart, with good and loving intentions, combined with agape and agapeo - it is that come to want God’s very best, for the beloved - and so we pray kindly for them - all of the time (when the heat is NOT on - tension and the NEED to be patient; so that when the heat IS turned up, we continue to pray in such a way as to slow our roll (our reaction) and listen for God’s Spirit and truth prompting and directing our responses.
Uprightness - the quality of being honorable or honest, morally correct in thinking and behavior toward others - decent, honest - trustworthy and truthful, conscientious, and of good character.
This is the same word used to describe God’s kindness toward us - Romans 2 and what are the intentions of that kindness. So, God IS love, love IS kind, and God’s kindness - expressed in His patience - IS intended to lead us to repentance (as a gentle word turns back…)
These two concepts are necessarily intertwined, as one leads to and promotes the other, in fact, we cannot be kind if we are not patient - to be patient, is to be kind and leads to, allows, and promotes kindness - and kindness, this gentle spirit, is God’s super-power - the counterintuitive nature of the kingdom of heaven.
We might be asking the question “what does this mean in evangelism, or apologetics, or the correction of another.?
Certainly, this would include the admonition to “prepared to give a reason for your help when you’re asked“, but even more profoundly, it is that we are slow to speak, after being quick to listen, and then, to add patience and kindness, to be considerate, and deliver it as to be guided by God, spirit, and wisdom, and truth. And even in our preparation, or having studied it prepared for whatever question you might be ask, I’ve been patient, and kind, 10% response, or better, yet a reaction, and guides us into the truth that needs to be spoken in this context, not necessarily what we thought needed to be said, but God really Determines and wills
Patience and kindness will allow you to know what to say, and how. It is what enables us to hear the Holy Spirit, and be directed by his prompting. To hear the words come up in our hearts and minds, to know how to respond with wisdom and grace, honesty and truth. It is gods way of dealing with each of us, of loving us, and he calls us to love as we have been loved.
These two are intertwined
Fruit of the Spirit - patience, kindness
Galatians 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
Ephesians 4:32 Be kind and tenderhearted to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you.
Colossians 3:12 Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with hearts of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
Kindness in the life of the church: is that we are useful in the lives of one another - acts of service and good works that really meet, real needs in the life of another - beloved - always done with gentleness and benevolence - compassionate, thoughtful, considerate, charitable acts of goodwill.
Even when a brother or sister is in sin, we are to kindly go to them, and be merciful to them (remembering that they, and we, are made out of dust, we do not treat them as their sin deserves - one we can’t (judge and condemn not) and two, we remember that we are but dust - frail and fragile and God has shown me mercy and not treated me as my sin deserves!) in love, speak the truth to them, with them - not at them. (Matt 7:3 18:15-17; Gal 6:1-2; Col 3:13-15; 1Peter 1:22; 4:8; Pr 10:12; Ja 5:20; Lu 6:27-42)
Even the discipline of having to separate oneself from the one in sin, done kindly, gently, graciously, is an act of mercy - done in a way so that when they do come to their senses, they might remember our kindness and turn back in remorse and sorrow with a goal to be forgiven and restored - reconciled. (2Cor )
And toward the one who is not (yet) in Christ, that we do not condemn, but keeping in mind God’s mercy toward me, I kindly share space with them in a way that examples the love and wisdom of God and look for opportunities to share God’s grace with them - right up to our being prepared to give a reason for my hope when they ask and to be gentle and respectful in my responses - trusting that the Holy Spirit will prompt, direct, and guide, and being a willing participant in His responding through us - honoring each person and each encounter for who and what they are - because kindness is attentive, deliberate, and considerate.
And how much more true and necessary is kindness when these things happen in the crucible of our families and homes - with those who are closest to us?
And how much more in our own homes? The environment we create and keep - is it loving? That is, is it patient and kind?
